Something must be very wrong!
by alunchbox
Summary: What if a crazy author and her friend get blown to Hogwarts and finds that alot of things are very wrong? rr


Disclaimer: After reading the story you would probably wonder if jk rowling would EVER write anything like this.  
  
A/n- this is my first attempt at writing fanfic, so I expect that it would be lousy (and it is). As it is a parody, I suggest to those 'serious' type of pple not to read it. You'll probably flame me anyway. If not, enjoy! (It's really really lame). As dog collar had taken part in giving me ideas, she would be in my story!  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Yippee! We are finally going to watch Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets!" said the author, jumping up and down in anticipation.  
  
"Yay!!! FINALLY!!!" Dog collar replied while jumping up and down in anticipation too.  
  
Suddenly, a huge (and I mean HUGE) gust of wind blew and the author and dog collar were thrown off their feet. They landed in front of an enormous castle. They looked up and to their utmost amazement; they saw people flying on broomsticks.  
  
(A/n- from now on, the author will be TA and Dog collar will be DC)  
  
"Er... Brooms and a huge castle? Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" TA muttered to DC.  
  
"I think you are. HOGWARTS???" DC gasped.  
  
"Let's go and find Dumbledore's office then." TA suggested.  
  
Somehow or other they managed the find Dumbledore's office and gave the right password (sephy's corner) (a/n- don't smirk, Dog collar and peachgirl1608... but I'm smirking too...)  
  
However, the sight that greeted them in Dumbledore's office shocked the living hell out of them. Beside Dumbledore, who was unmistakable, was another tall bony man who had red slits for eyes and very pale skin. He was of course, Lord Voldemort.  
  
"Voldemort? I thought Professor Dumbledore and Voldie are the greatest enemies! Why are they having tea together?" TA and DC were very puzzled. "Enemies? We are never enemies! We are the... Yoyoyoyoyoyoyooo... GRANDFATHERS! Welcome to the Yoyo Grandfathers' Yoyo headquarters!" chorused Dumbie and Voldie.  
  
"What???" (TA and DC started to sweat intensively. -_-")  
  
"Now who are you? How on earth did you appear here?" inquired Voldie.  
  
The author felt very disorientated. "It's kind of weird. Don't ask question and we'll tell you no lies."  
  
Dumbie smiled in ecstasy at the thought of having two guests from nowhere in the castle. "Alright then, let's escort you to he Gryffindor tower. I'm sure Harry and his friends will treat you very well." "We are going to meet Harry Potter! Yippee!!!"  
  
After climbing countless stairs and walking through various corridors, they finally reached Gryffindor tower.  
  
"Password?"  
  
"Soft fluffy cotton candy."  
  
TA and DC wondered who chose that password. (A/n- limited number of pple will understand this joke. I know that you're smirking peachgirl1608, so am I.) DC felt very much like strangling TA to take the smirk off her face.  
  
As TA and DC entered the common room, they heard many shouting and screaming.  
  
"Draco Malfoy! What do you mean by stealing my Chudley Cannons hat? Give it here!" someone with bright red hair roared.  
  
"Draco Malfoy???" TA and DC turned towards each other at exactly the same time and stared. "How on earth did he get into Gryffindor? If he is in Gryffindor, what is the Slytherin house for?" (TA and DC started to sweat more intensively than before.)  
  
A boy with messy black hair and a lightning bolt scar came over. "We have guests! Hello, I'm Harry potter! This is Ron Weasley and Draco Malfoy. Who are you?"  
  
"You're Harry potter! I must say that you look very DIFFERENT from Daniel Radcliffe. Oh, and I'm Dog collar."  
  
"I'm THE author and may I ask you a question? How on earth did you Malfoy become best friends? I thought you were enemies!"  
  
"Enemies? How can we be enemies? We are the..."  
  
(Uh oh...)  
  
"... Yoyoyoyoyoyoyooo BROTHERS!!! The Yoyo Brothers!"  
  
(TA and DC starts to sweat even MORE intensively)  
  
"What's wrong?" Harry asked TA and DC when he saw the 'I am so amazed' look on their faces.  
  
"Maybe you will understand better when you see this."  
  
Some how or other TA and DC managed to get and television, a VCD player and a Harry potter movie VCD. They all work perfectly fine in Hogwarts, as they are magic proof.  
  
"This is the VCD of Harry potter movie. It 's VERY different from you all."  
  
"Wow mate! Didn't know that you have a whole movie dedicated to you!" Ron said in amazement.  
  
The author pressed play and the movie started. After awhile...  
  
"Is that supposed to be Uncle Vernon? But he treats me really well! That is totally untrue? What is the meaning of this?" Harry mutter in outrage.  
  
"Just a question Harry, how did you get that scar when Voldie couldn't have killed you?" asked a curious DC.  
  
"Oh that, I got that when my parents were killed in a car crash."  
  
"WHAT???" The author and Dog collar were really, really shocked. "A CAR CRASH???"  
  
The author and Dog collar then fainted because of serious dehydration due to excessive loss of sweat. (-_-"")  
  
A/n- that's all! I don't think I'll be writing another chappie. Hopefully I'll get some reviews! Thanks for spending time reading. Don't tell me it's lousy, I know. 


End file.
